How to be epic: a post on dads and building confidence
Where does confidence really come from?
Not from praise. Not from perfection. Definitely not from performance reviews.
Confidence comes from something far more powerful:
Being seen. Being believed in. Being invited to rise.
And some of the people most responsible for that?
Fathers.
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The research is clear:
✅ Dads who express belief in their children build deep internal agency — especially when they let them struggle, then solve.
✅ Dads who engage in “challenging play” — a little risky, a little rough — help kids develop stronger emotional regulation and resilience.
✅ Dads who model emotional presence raise children who see vulnerability as strength — not weakness.
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I know this firsthand.
You might already know that my childhood revolved around hours of conversation with my Dad over coffee (or, back then, milk with a splash of his espresso). We talked about mindset. About confidence. About how communication shapes self-belief — and how self-belief drives action.
We built businesses together. He presented me with real problems, trusted me to solve them, and actually implemented my ideas. That trust? That built something permanent.
What you might not know is that the other thing my childhood revolved around was soccer.
From playing, to coaching, to watching, to cheering from the stands — I spent over 20,000 hours immersed in the game. My family went to every single MetroStars home game for the first 11 MLS seasons. We were all in.
One summer, Fiorentina — an Italian team I idolized — came to play in New York. Gabriel Batistuta, my hero, was in town. After the match, the team didn’t come out to sign autographs.
But thanks to all those conversations with my Dad — I had an idea.
I turned to my parents and said, “Wait here.” Then I took a deep breath, lifted my chin, smiled back at them… and walked right past the security guards and onto the Fiorentina team bus.
Absurd? Yes. Epic? Also yes.
The players couldn’t believe it. They cracked up, took photos with me, and when I asked Batistuta to come off the bus to take a picture with my Mom — he did.
That moment didn’t create my confidence. It revealed it.
Because confidence is built long before you need it.
Not through speeches or shiny awards. But in quiet moments of trust. In being allowed to try, to fail, and to rise — over and over again.
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So what does that have to do with leadership?
Everything.
Because the same wiring applies at work.
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I always urge leaders: If you want your people to rise, stop trying to perfect them. Start believing in them.
It’s not about pep talks or micromanagement. It’s about presence. It’s about belief. It’s about better conversations.
Just like the best Dads do. Just like mine did.
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So how do you lead like that? With BRAVE®:
👀 Be Present: Not as the fixer. As the witness. Presence breeds courage.
🤝 Rapport: Relationships create the safety people need to take bold risks.
🎧 Active Listening: Confidence grows when people feel fully heard— not managed.
🫶 Vulnerability: “I don’t know yet” can be the most powerful thing a leader says.
🧠 Empathy: Lead the person, not just the project. That’s where real confidence takes root.
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This Father’s Day, a reflection:
Who gave you the confidence to lead?
And how are you passing it on?
Whether you’re raising kids or raising up a team — the mission is the same: Create a space where people feel trusted enough to grow.
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Closing thought...
Confidence doesn’t come from control. It comes from connection.
Let’s lead like the best Dads do.
And then watch as our team rises to do EPIC things.
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Happy Father's Day to all the Dads reading this!
With heart,
Elisabeth